Shlomit Kriger
Tribune Correspondent
One bright sunny day, Barry Shainbaum, 18, stood at a bus stop in his hometown of Hamilton with a guitar in his hand. As he got on the bus, he had a premonition that he was somehow leaving.
Shortly after, standing in his girlfriend’s living room, he experienced a mental breakdown.
Two days later, he awoke from a long sleep to see his mother sitting beside his bed in the psychiatric ward of a local hospital.
“You’re sick, and you will be for the rest of your life,” she said, repeating the doctor’s comment. “We’ll take care of you.”
This was where he spent the rest of that summer before returning to school.
Then at age 21, Shainbaum experienced another episode while on his way to see his psychiatrist, who then diagnosed him as manic depressive. Now known as bipolar disorder, the condition is characterized by a series of moods that fluctuate between mania (feeling indestructible and hyperactive) and depression.
He was then put on Lithium to level his moods and was told he’d be on the medication permanently.
Today, youthful looking, with a zest for life, Shainbaum, 53, is completely cured of a mental illness rarely defeated. He continuously sprinkles inspiration working as a successful commercial photographer, author, professional speaker, musician, and most recently, host of his new Jewish talk show Sundays at 11 a.m. on Kitchener’s Christian radio station, CJTW 94.3 Faith FM.
“I once read that God doesn’t give someone any more challenges than he or she can handle,” he said, his eyes sparkling as he smiled from his seat on the black leather couch of his downtown Toronto photography studio. “I think there’s a lot of truth in that. And we strengthen ourselves through life’s challenges.”
Despite his illness, Shainbaum had earned a degree in photographic arts from Ryerson University and ran his photography business fruitfully.
But his worst bout of depression arrived in 1986, leading him to lose his apartment, money, and all of his belongings.
He spent the next 16 months at a downtown psychiatric boarding house, continuously passing a five-by-10 storage locker containing pieces of his former life. The only evidence he had left was his portfolio, which he’d flip through, in disbelief of what he’d accomplished.
Now he spent most of his days reading the daily papers at the local library and then sitting in a nearby park in the afternoons watching children play as he munched on potato chips and drank pop.
He went to bed each night praying he wouldn’t wake up. Yet he didn’t believe killing his body was a solution, because “people are spiritual beings first,” he said.
Instead, Shainbaum embarked on a path to greater self-awareness. In addition to receiving psychotherapy, he read psychology and self-help books on such topics as self-esteem, which he felt were instrumental in the process. He also explored metaphysical approaches, including astrology, karma, Kabbalah, and bioenergetic therapy.
“There are different medical theories on mental illness,” he said. “Some say it relates to a chemical imbalance in the brain, which I think is true. But I think it mostly derives from an emotional imbalance.”
Finally, tired of living under such conditions, he rented an apartment, where he slept on a mattress and slowly began to re-establish himself and his business.
In 1989, Shainbaum claimed he was cured and went off his medication. His psychiatrist was skeptical and his family feared he’d slip back. Yet he knew what his body was telling him and simply continued therapy until six years ago.
Apart from occasional bad dreams and the ordinary blues that creep up every so often, he now feels much more grounded and has learned to enjoy the simple things in life.
“There are great lessons that can come from suffering,” he said. “Part of the purpose of mine was for me to get to know myself, to find my inner fortitude and understand what I should do [with my life].”
In July 1998, Shainbaum took on a project he believes he’d have never considered if it weren’t for his past.
Inspired by a conversation with the late Charles Templeton, former renowned Canadian author and journalist, he came up with the idea to produce a book containing portraits of people with integrity who have positive impacts on the world.
Over the next few years, Shainbaum travelled the world photographing and interviewing dozens of celebrities, political leaders, and others who’ve made a mark in history, including renowned psychic Uri Geller and former Israeli Prime Minister Shimon Peres.
About 200 publishers turned down his book, Hope and Heroes, before it got accepted in 2001.
When the Hamilton Spectator interviewed Shainbaum about his book in 2000, he opened up about his journey “from mental illness to mental health” publicly for the very first time.
He soon found himself featured by such media outlets as the Los Angeles Times, Toronto Star, and Canada AM. Strangers from all over commended his courage.
“I was scared,” he said. “What I had been through was like a deep dark dirty secret for me. But by talking about my experiences publicly and helping other people through that, I didn’t feel demolished inside anymore.”
Nurturing a strong will to assist others, Shainbaum went on to become a motivational speaker, encouraging others to discover their own hero within and move from obstacles to opportunities.
Maintaining balance, he also volunteers for numerous organizations and shares his love for music at hospitals, senior homes, and psychiatric drop-in centres.
Shainbaum’s radio show gig came two months ago when the Faith FM manager approached him after he completed an interview promoting his book on the show and asked whether he’d like his own talk show. While the station is Christian based, it operates under a religious license and welcomes shows of various cultures.
Although hesitant for fear he was taking on more than he could handle, Shainbaum couldn’t resist.
“I see this show as another creative endeavour,” he said. “It’s another wonderful opportunity to showcase what I do, as well as the work of others who lead in the Jewish community.”
The show presents a Jewish slant on various societal issues, including mental health, inspiration and motivation, the arts, and ethics, all with a touch of wisdom from guests spanning all walks of life.
With his gift for gab, Shainbaum remains articulate and knows how to draw listeners in.
“The purpose of the show is to bring an element of inspiration and greater knowledge on choosing life and to educate,” he said.
Shainbaum hopes to someday expand the show to other cities.
Future guests include Rabbi Joseph Bloch, Beth Jacob Congregation, Kitchener (Sept. 25) and actor Ed Asner (Nov. 6).
Hear Shainbaum’s talk show live on the Internet from CJTW 94.3 FM Sunday mornings: www.faithfm.org. Or for more information: www.barryshainbaum.com.
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